Tuesday, I sat looking out the window of my workplace, by any casual glance a woman enjoying a cup of coffee and a chocolate chip cookie. Yet inside I was experiencing terror. I breathed through it and went on with my day; in fact a text from a friend brought laughter and the interruption of the intensity I was feeling. The next day, while working with a client who is herself a healer, we talked about her terror, and she told me that all of her clients had been experiencing fear that week as well.
Times like this, people invariably ask me: “what’s going on with the planets?”
And it happens that, this time, I have to say–I don’t know. Of course, I’m aware of the major comings and goings of the planets. We’re still in the long passage of the Uranus/Pluto square. Mars is slowing down to station into his retrograde. The nodal axis has just changed signs from Scorpio/Taurus to Aries/Libra. Mercury is retrograde. And on it goes. Yet, when I look to find the answers to why so many of us are feeling so much fear, I can’t always point to a specific aspect and say, yes, this. The larger patterns at work in our society–certainly recognizable in the passages of the outer planets–are so vast and impersonal, in a way, that it is hard to plug in as an individual and recognize our own emotions as a reflection of the macro. But so it is; and knowing that the tensions active between Uranus in Aries and Pluto in Capricorn inherently include the potential for terror as society morphs and changes may help and also may not. What do we do, in times of stress, to comfort the fearful self within?
As an astrologer, of course I am a proponent of the helpfulness of working with what is, astrologically speaking. And, as a healer and student of life, I’m also increasingly attuned to working with what is. Intellectual understanding of anything will only take us so far, and in the moments of emotional flow being able to witness and honor ourselves as we are, without “explaining” it may be the single most helpful thing we can do. Breath, compassion, being extremely present with what we are feeling without telling a story about it are the in-the-moment keys to navigating the deep territory that exists for us all to explore.
Those who know me may smile at this point; I’m a great one for self-analysis and finding the reasons for things. And I’m finding that I’m having to let some of that go. My healing journey at this point is more about just experiencing what I’m feeling and less about understanding why. Because thinking about feeling is not the same as feeling the feeling. Inside all of us are young parts crying out for attention and unconditional love. Maybe the inner child thing sounds trite to you by now, but my belief is that much of our growth comes from a witnessing of the scared, lonely, angry, and neglected child within. That same child that once seen and honored, gifts us with its capacity for joy and creativity.
Pisces and Libra are emphasized right now, the signs that govern compassion, love, empathy, harmony, beauty, and right action. From March 1 to May 20, Mars, the planet of courage and action will be retrograde in Libra. I’m tempted to say more, to give you more information. But perhaps I’ll just ask you to be soft with yourself, and fair. To witness the inner landscape. Weep, move, laugh, rage; to take action on behalf of your inner children. To dream, to play, and to deeply love.
And to remember, that YOU are deeply loved.